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July 27, 2005
It's time for Starbucks to put one "Bad Barista" in every store
I was in the Suburban Chicago Edens Plaza Starbucks a few weeks ago and a guy in his late teens came in without a shirt. His girlfriend (shirt on, by the way) ordered their drinks and they sat down. I was expecting a Starbucks employee to tell the guy to put a shirt on, but no such luck. (This is very small store, so it's not like they didn't see him.) I'm sorry, but I don't want to see shirtless people in food/drink outlets. It was at that moment I realized that each Starbucks store needs a "Bad Barista" -- a tough guy who wears a black apron and deals with the kind of Starbucks customers I don't like. These people include:
1. Customers who talk on cell phones while ordering their drinks. (Bad Barista: "Turn that damn thing off before I dip it in a venti Frap!")
2. People who take a newspaper off the for-sale rack, read it, then return it and expect that somene's going to pay for that used copy. (Bad Barista: "Hey cheapskate: You have five bucks for a coffee drink and can't fork over fifty-cents for a newspaper? Gimme a break!")
3. "Guests" who order drinks that contain more than eight words. (Bad Barista: "You're not impressing anyone with your fancy-ass drink! It's a short drip coffee for you!")
4. People who order water and don't want to pay for it. No wonder prices are going up; we're subsidizing those freebies. (Bad Barista: "See that dog bowl outside? The water in there is fresh.")
5. Regular meetings of Old Codger's Clubs, where old guys basically talk, cough and blow their noses for hours on end. (Bad Barista: "Ever hear of Denny's? They were made for people like you! Now make a bee-line over there.")
Care to add to the Bad Barista's task list?
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Comments
6. When some cunty soccer mom indulges her bratty 8 year old kid with a half-caf-double-decaf-breve-affogato-no-cream and the brat changes his/her mind mid-drink and stares blankly at the board trying to figure out what to order --- with 9,000 people in line behind them.
(Bad Barista: Time's up brat! SMACK!)
Posted by: Varangy | Jul 27, 2005 3:23:07 PM
People who start placing their order then run around and start gathering up things they want to buy. I am not talking about items the workers must get for them but items on the shelves the customers must pick out.
Posted by: dave | Jul 27, 2005 3:31:42 PM
I think I am already the bad barista. I mean I slowly go through a person's order, repeat the person's name, repeat the order, and then forget half-way through the calling what I actually meant to say so I start all over again! 7) The bad barista who tells the homeless people to get out and get a job. And when they get out that means not standing next to the door and begging for money. When I order a drink, I put the person on hold on my phone and tell them I'm ordering and can't talk to them. The barista looks very happy!
Posted by: Boston Starbucks Rebel | Jul 27, 2005 4:00:45 PM
Out here in San Diego it's not that uncommon for guys to come in with no shirts or for girls to come in their swimsuits...that is, in the coastal stores. It's just part of the Southern California culture. However, if I decide to go to Starbucks shirtless, I sit outside...it's a little awkward inside.
Posted by: Friendy | Jul 27, 2005 5:20:02 PM
My old store needed a Bad Barista each shift to deal with the parade of shoplifters, people who wanted to shoot up drugs in our bathroom (always fun to find blood on the floor and a syringe in the trashbin), tip-stealers, and homeless people wanting water.
We were a few blocks from a fairly crappy neighborhood and although most customers were just fine, the ones that weren't REALLY weren't.
Posted by: ExSFBarista | Jul 27, 2005 6:50:30 PM
I'll admit it. I'm guilty of #1, or at least I used to be when I still commuted. My lunch hour is only so long, and yeah I returned calls while in line. A Bad Barista would probably have my picture posted!
Posted by: CGG | Jul 27, 2005 8:25:48 PM
The people who put bare feet up on the seats, the homeless people who come in with bags and food, the nursing mothers who don't even try to cover up a bit, the screeching toddlers running around when EVERYONE ELSE is working quietly on laptops or having conversations in a normal tone of voice.
Posted by: Deeni | Jul 27, 2005 9:25:12 PM
The idiots who bring their kids with them when they are 'working' ... hey dummy, that's what the HOME office is for!!!
The dolts who think it's OK to walk behind me while I'm working on my PowerBook, look at the screen and ask me what I'm working on... or say really brillient things like 'working?' 'on a computer?' 'is that the Internet?'
Yes, I'm working, now fuck off please.
Posted by: david parmet | Jul 28, 2005 3:26:40 AM
Table/seat staker-outers. People who are in a couple or more, and send one of the brood out to claim a table even though they are last in a long line. I think the Potbelly's rule should apply in Starbucks -- don't sit down 'till you gotcher order, biotch.
Ok, I'm guilty of this. But this weekend I had a seat-staker take the last seat at a tiny Starbucks in downtown Chicago from right under my nose. I'm still bitter ;-)
Posted by: ivy | Jul 28, 2005 7:45:36 AM
What's wrong with #1? I'm perfectly capable of telling the person on the other line to hold on for a second while I order. What if someone called me while I was walking to the store--should I really ask the caller to wait an unspecified amount of time until I get through the line and order? That could 10-20 minutes at some busy Starbucks!
What you really need to worry about is ANY behaviour that delays placing the order when the line is long. This includes standing at the counter talking on the phone, *but not ordering*, or just standing at the counter and trying to decide on an order after having already been in line for ten minutes, or fumbling to find a form of payment when it should have been in your hand already.
And what's wrong with #4? If I order a drink, why shouldn't Starbucks give me water for free? What's the cost of the water relative to the cost of the drink? Do they charge you extra for (regular) water at (most) restaurants?
Posted by: Winter | Jul 28, 2005 8:13:54 AM
Re: Free Water. I'm talking about, for example, the junior high kids who (at the Central St. store in Evanston) pile into Starbucks and want free water (without purchase) after school. Also, the halfway-house people (who visit the Main Street store in Evanston) and say, "I get my check on Friday, so can I have a large free water today?"
Posted by: STARBUCKS GOSSIP webmaster | Jul 28, 2005 9:33:23 AM
You can hardly blame the customers who order a drink with more than 8 words...my local Starbucks handed out a multi-page booklet on how to make your drink "your own" by asking for any number of tongue-twisting permutations. If you want short drink orders, don't offer 17 variations.
As for free water, give me a break. On a $1.90 for a venti coffee, Starbucks is probably making about $1.50 profit. You can't throw in the ocassional free cup of water?
And as for reading the paper, I do look at the front page and then put it down again. So sue me. If the line moved a little faster I wouldn't have the time. And what exactly is a "used" newspaper? If they don't want people looking at them, put them behind the counter.
Posted by: an american | Jul 28, 2005 10:16:40 AM
Has the heat and sweating taken the milk of human
kindness from our Starbucks Gossip Webmaster?
There are better cafes, better lounges and such
than starbucks' coffee tills.
So a few people don't conform to the (your) ideal.
Such is life.
How about "People who blog about coffee. Bad customer, you
are doing the equivalent of examining your stools in public and out loud. You must go out the back door where
you will be taken to Costa Rica to work in the coffee plantations for two months and
there examine your stools after eating the local diet.
Posted by: Good Good, poor coffee | Jul 28, 2005 10:29:56 AM
Howdy!
Does anyone know where the name "Starbucks" comes from? I have an idea but I wanted to "sea" if anyone knew for sure.
Posted by: Kevin | Jul 28, 2005 11:18:32 AM
Yes, the heat has made me *very* cranky. If fact, I need a cold water now. (I'll pay for it, thank you.)
Posted by: STARBUCKS GOSSIP webmaster | Jul 28, 2005 11:58:26 AM
What's wrong with giving a homeless person a damn water? Hell, create a separate donation jar so patrons can buy 'em a coffee and a damn bagel, too. S/he can take the occassional free water I should be getting but don't have time to take in the mornings.
What do you have against poor/possibly mentally ill people getting a little hydration?
And why don't old people (and their physical frailty) have every right to down an overpriced coffee with the rest of us? God Bless 'em for getting out of the house with the few friends they have left. Why do they have to go somewhere as depression as Denny's?
For me, the "bad" barista would be reserved for people who are just outright rude to the staff and customers. The over-indulgent parent is an excellent example!
Posted by: isadora | Jul 28, 2005 12:03:23 PM
Wow, a lot of defensive customers!
The fact is if you are friendly and semi-regular the baristas will bend over (well..) backwards and let you break any rule in the book. Except the newspaper shit, I used to hate that crap.
Posted by: jubal harshaw | Jul 28, 2005 12:23:55 PM
I wish I could have a Bad Barista paddle so I could spank all the bad custoemrs. There could also be this apron that says "Bad Barista"!
Posted by: Boston Starbucks Rebel | Jul 28, 2005 2:20:34 PM
Guys .. in my country (KSA) u could see the most stupid customers ever .. "Caramel Frapp" .. "Oh is that Ice Cream" ? ...but what can we do .. Customers Always Right .. as much as painfull it is that sometimes u wish to kick them right in the ass ..RIGHT PARTNERSSSS ?!!
Posted by: Alia | Jul 28, 2005 2:42:56 PM
I have no problem with getting someone - homeless or not - the occasional cup of water if they wait in line like everyone else and are polite about it, but the problem is that people abuse the privilege, and the more desperate their circumstances are, the more they tend to abuse it.
I don't care if you're poor, drug addicted, mentally ill, or all of the above. You lose the right to my giving you ANYTHING the moment you stick your hands into my tip jar the moment my back is turned to get you that cup of water. Baristas in my town get minimum wage, and the tips we get make a real difference in our ability to make ends meet.
Posted by: ExSFBarista | Jul 28, 2005 2:51:40 PM
There is a woman who comes into our store every day, orders a tall decaf drip,(Sumatra; you know who you are!!) eats samples with both hands, and takes change out of the tip jar to pay for her coffee...unless I see her first. I move the tip jars when I see her in line. She also complains loudly every time we don't have bran muffins (could use the roughage, from the looks of her) but NEVER buys one when we do.
I wanna be the "Bad Barista" for just one day, so I can toss her wrinkled ass on the street.
Posted by: javajockey | Jul 28, 2005 3:13:42 PM
Starbucks.... Starbuck; fist mate in Moby Dick
As for being a bad Barista. I love my job, but when I do leave Starbucks, I want to be a BAD Barista.
I want to say, "Hey pal, You are NOT that friggin important, hang the damn phone up and order or move your ass..."
"Quit holding up the 10 people behind you while you search your suitcase of a purse for 4 damn pennies. Just give me the $5 bill and put your friggin chnage in the tip jar."
"No you can't change your order for the forth time, your drink is made, you paid for it, move along."
As for water, you pay, I'll give you any size, as much water as you want, afterall, you are a customer - you are not buying anything - then Why are you here bugging me for a Venti cup of free water? Here is a tiny cup of cold water to quench your thirst. Now move along!
Posted by: CoffeeBoy | Jul 28, 2005 3:44:55 PM
I'm a Barista in the birthplace of Starbucks, and we're definitely a busy, busy store. In regards to having a "Bad Barista," that's great and all, but you wouldn't last a day in the strict Seattle district. I would love to be the BB for a day so I can statisfy my urge to slap the people who violate #3 (long drinks). We have a woman that comes in from the telecommunication build next door (not naming due to possible backlash)and orders this drink - decaf single grande extra vanilla 2% extra carmel 185 degree with whip cream caramel machiato. Keep in mide she does this around 8:30-8:45am, definitely the busiest time for us. It's people like her that I despise, and there are quite a few customers like her that come to our store. People behind her often are impressed by her (really pathetic) or just laugh at her. What I really want to say is exactly what a BB would say, "You're not impressing anyone with your fancy-ass drink! It's a short drip coffee for you!, so get your sweet milk and your ugly ass out of here!" Anyways, that's my biggest petpeve. In regards to free water, I'm not against it. I give out water consistently to the hot ladies that work next door to us, and I guess it's just another way to lower Starbucks' profit margin, which is fine with me! Ok, gotta get out of here before I go on another big rant...
Posted by: *Mohammed* (fake name due to possible backlash) | Jul 28, 2005 4:49:53 PM
I work downtown in a mid-to large city in the mid-South and some days I swear half our customers are homeless people asking for free samples and Venti ice waters. It gets old fast...like around 6am. The rest of the people that come in are clueless fools wanting one of those "frap a KEEN oes" or (my favorite after the homeless people) Cheap Guy that demands a blended soy beverage for under $2 who skulks about waiting for a pastry to crumble so he can point it out so we have to either toss it or sample it (I prefer the former in his case) and his female counterpart Designer Suit and Sunglasses Wearing Cheap ' Do you Have a Free Sample of Green Tea Frappucino' Been in Twice This Week Asking the Same Thing Never Buying Crap Not Fooling Anyone Yr Game is Over Cow.
Oh how I would LOVE to be Bad Barista for a day...Especially after I watched one of my cow workers being verbally assaulted by some crazy horrible smelling beast of a homeless guy. What *$ needs is balls to kick out the stupid and horrible IMO it would greatly improve the whole "experience"
Posted by: bitter barista | Jul 28, 2005 7:43:10 PM
Baristas should have more power to be "bad." Anyone who is seen taking from the tip jar should be banned from the store.
Off the topic a bit: Why does Starbucks have open tip jars? It's a crime of opportunity. I mean, they don't have to be as secure as a Salvation Army kettle, but at least a cover with an opening smaller than a hand, and a latch.
Baristas have enough to do without policing the tip jar.
Posted by: ivy | Jul 29, 2005 7:08:46 AM
Don't you despise a customer who comes in and asks for grande non-fat cappucino and you get all excited because the store is almost empty and you have the chance to make the perfect cappucino, in a "for here" cup(!), with liquid chrome foam piled high and super sexy delicious. You create, very likely the best cappucino of your life, not too dry and and just at the right temperature. Then that same customer, you know the one, who wears the fake Gucci sunglasses and only comes in the day after welfare cheques are diposited, complains and says, "this is ALL foam, can you fill it up with milk. I didn't pay $3.91 for a cup full of foam." Thats what a fucking cappucino is you ignorant hoochie fool! Some people are just soooo not worthy!
Posted by: Jon | Jul 29, 2005 8:20:17 AM
I thought "bad barista" was the barista that lets five or six coffee drinks line up at the espresso machine and then screws upp each of them. I mean I just want an americano (on ice, medium) is that really hard?
Note: this doesn't happen at my regular city shop, but usually at my nearby suburban shop
Posted by: Frank | Jul 29, 2005 1:24:03 PM
I also want to be the bad barista. Like, when a customer orders a grand latte, gets to the hand-off counter while I'm putting a venti frappuccino(dosn't matter which flavor)on the bar...I yell out "venti vanilla bean frappucino" and the latte customer grabs it takes a sip then accusingly say "this isn't what I ordered, I wanted a grande latte". Oh how I would love to say "I know lady, it's not my first day. You just took that other customers drink, which I now have to drop everything to re-make. Your latte is about 10 drinks down the line. So just wait your dam turn. You are not the only person in the world."
Posted by: fakesmile | Jul 29, 2005 2:59:17 PM
I like to order 17-word beverages... :X But I usually try to do it just when there aren't any people in line behind me.
Posted by: dave | Jul 29, 2005 4:15:25 PM
I wholeheartedly agree with having a bad barista. The store right by my office needs one to move along all the people in line who insist on taking an hour to order their drink while I'm waiting for them to hurry the fuck up because I'm on the verge of being late.
Though they shouldn't be called the bad barista. In a tip of the hat to Seinfeld, the bad barista should be called the barista nazi. Take too long....NO COFFEE FOR YOU!!! Drink too complicated?.....NO COFFEE FOR YOU!!! Look at the barista wrong?......NO COFFEE FOR YOU!!!
Posted by: Thinksdifferent | Jul 29, 2005 6:51:01 PM
AAACCCKKK!!! That's it! Coffee Nazi! THAT'S what I wanna be! ;p
Posted by: javajockey | Jul 29, 2005 6:58:43 PM
People who want to pay for their venti coffee out of the tip jar. Sorry the cities taxes make out venti cost 2.01 instead of the neighboring cities 1.99, but it's not your money and if we let you do it everyone else will want to do it too.
Families ordering triple venti drinks each requiring a seperate pitcher of milk right before close at the worst possible time (marzocco)
Smelly homeless man who squats in the cafe and harasses my coworkers for spare change while we are working then asks for a free water.
The bitchy custom drink lady who complains we will mess up her drink but always forgets to ask for "no water" or uses vague terminology like "extra hot" when she really want something past the boiling point of milk.
You are infamous at our stores for rudely attacking every new Barista.
Those who race to the register and stare, dumbfoundedly, at the whole bean coffee board and refuse to let me help them find the that "you know, the mint frappachewy thing" on the other menu.
People who pretend to understand me when I'm trying to confirm a drink order then mention, while I'm topping their iced venti mocha, that it doesn't look right and they really need a venti mocha frappuccino.
People who refer to frappuccinos as FRAPPS.
Decaf Light frappuccino complaints.
Chantico in July.
Drinks containing fractions of a shot.
"Hi, can I get a 3/4 shot grade White Chocolate Mocha" ... "a 1/4 shot venti mocha"
Posted by: Can't always be nice | Jul 29, 2005 11:52:39 PM
Uggh...I hate it when customers call Frappuccinos FRAPPS.
Posted by: Friendly | Jul 30, 2005 1:23:39 AM
Having worked in the service industries, #1 is the worst -- it's just rude. It dehumanises the person serving. They're usually trained to offer the best customer service and there really isn't anything worse than said customer not repaying with some attention.
I work in a call centre and frequently some will call with a query and before I can answer their mobile phone will go and I'll be sat there waiting for them to have a chat before they return and I can help them. Sometimes it'll happen just after I've answered the call. I realise in the cafe situation its different because you're face 2 face, but I've watched it happen in our local and sometimes you're the next person in line waiting for the #1 offender to be served and it takes minutes longer because the barrista is having to wait for a pause in the customer's conversation in order to ask questions / take money / point them to the serving point.
All of which said, our local Starbucks has a couple of Bad Baristas. We are frequently plagued by chair to chair sellers -- people who walk in off the street and try to sell lighters/socks/meat from a dirty career bag of dubious quality. The minute they're clocked, a hithertoo unseen giant man in a green apron appears from the kitchen and makes his presence known ...
Posted by: Stu | Jul 30, 2005 1:58:37 PM
To the person complaining about breast feeding, and the OP who talked about someone wearing no shirt. Both of those are natural, the former should indeed be acceptable, whereas the later is debatable.
Posted by: | Jul 30, 2005 2:44:51 PM
Yeah, breastfeeding is natural. So's shitting.
Posted by: javajockey | Jul 30, 2005 3:45:56 PM
Working downtown Seattle in the "Heart of Seattle" district, comes complete with damn near minimum wage pay. Those who take our tips might as well just ask me to bend over and do a little double-dip action with their free iced venti water. As for those who want to sit in line, our labor allowance is regulated by our budget, which is determined by performance, and if it takes us one extra minute every other customer thats a significant portion of our capacity reduced, thus, I get no hours. So take forever, take our tips, spend our time serving paying customers with your free waters, and make sure you get insulted when I call the drink out in the right order to the barista on bar so that it's made right.. because you think we are correcting your improper ordering technique. And by the way, we do love our regulars, they are special and we connect with them. The curbhumper psychos that want special attention can find it somewhere around 4th and Pike underneath the bus stop bench. Thank you! I want to be your bad barista.
Posted by: heartofseattlebarista | Jul 30, 2005 5:22:57 PM
This is for the BAD CUSTOMER.
Why do you sit in line for 30min's giving me bad looks like I can make the line go faster because some person wants a (va-nu-ty) size latte 180' no foam (I'm sorry very hard to make 180' no foam) but hey we baristas can do anything....yaa
latte. Then you get to the front of the line and you sit there looking at the menu board for 20min when you had all that time waiting in line for 30min giving me crustys when the dang person four in row did the same thing...
How bout you check out the board and have your money ready. That might make thing go faster..
hmmmm something to think about
Posted by: | Jul 30, 2005 10:50:31 PM
In NYC, most of the tip jars are LOCKED. They are lidded plexiglass cubes with a slit on top, anchored to the counter.
Posted by: | Jul 31, 2005 10:39:38 AM
We used to have people all the time stuff cups and napkins in the toilets and flush. Nothing like cleaning up an overflowing toilet 2 times a day or so.
I say have a bad barista bathroom attendent.
Posted by: jillian | Jul 31, 2005 10:41:30 AM
Also, I won't deal with customers on cell phones. I will wave the next person up, or say "who is READY to order?" Once a girl on a cell phone was so spaced out, she forgot to take her change (from a $20 bill) and simply walked out of the store. Big tip that day.
Posted by: cornfrost | Jul 31, 2005 10:42:48 AM
I dont work at a Starbucks, or frankly, use Starbucks...I stumbled onto this message thread, but... the tip jar thing bothered me.
All your tip jars should be locked (as mentioned in NYC post) and anchored to the counter. No one should be able to get to your tips.
Your company should make sure its employee's earnings are protected.
Posted by: Ann | Jul 31, 2005 6:35:07 PM
I work at a Starbucks in San Diego, California. Last week Jessica Bile came in! She had her friend order her drink for her and waited in the corner very incognito with sunglasses and a hat on. The store was packed. However, as I glanced the store my eye caught her imediately, after watching her on 7th Heaven and her various movies, including her newly released Stealth. I glanced the names on the cups and didn't see a Jessica. I went about doing my business making drinks. Then I called out a grande soy vanilla chai latte for Jaime and Jessica Bile comes to pick it up at the hand off counter. I said, Hi Jessica! She smiled and left the store, it was pretty cool, she seems very low key for being a celeb. But just for all you celebrity fans, she drink grande soy vanilla chai's, so go order one!
Posted by: | Jul 31, 2005 11:21:12 PM
Jim --
You had me here until you got to the old codger part. I'm still trying to figure out why a group of older people sitting around, drinking coffee and talking is worse than a cluster of youngsters doing the same thing. To the person who wondered if they should put off a caller just because they're in line at Starbucks, I actually did an interview with someone who was in line at a coffee shop recently. He asked me to wait for a minute and it was just fine. If you feel compelled to conduct personal or professional business in line -- and I don't recommend it in most cases -- all you have to do is say I'll call you right back or I'm putting you on hold for a sec when you get toward the front.
One more thought: In a lot of coffee shops, I find it's the regular customers who serve as guardians of conduct good or bad.
Posted by: Staci K. | Aug 1, 2005 9:40:38 AM
you forgot to add when customers come thru the drive thru and have their kids order their drinks for them because they think its cute, when what it really is, is annoying. (Bad Barista: "hey its FRAPPUCINO, NOT FRAPPALAPPA, and no its not cute, thank you very much")
Posted by: ashley | Aug 2, 2005 1:14:22 AM
oh yeah and "can i get A VENTI CARAMEL FRAPPUCINO LIGHT with EXTRA EXTRA CARAMEL AND EXTRA WHIP CREAM, uhh thats fat free right?" argh people are silly!
Posted by: ashley | Aug 2, 2005 1:17:46 AM
Bad Barista sounds like a Penthouse pictoral. (Extra foam!)
Posted by: Larry Davenport | Aug 2, 2005 7:52:51 AM
i didn't read every comment, so if somebody already posted this, lo siento mucho...my mocha didn't last that long, but, there was a time when an earthen jug 'o water and little plastic cups were available at the condiment bar, meaning, drink up thirsty youth or homeless! of course, the baristas would have to fill up the thing and all that or am i thinking nordstrom cafe espresso's here?
how about bad starbucks custie?
as in "hey baristas, please talk about jenny's new designer specs she wore during her shift yesterday on your own time", espech when you've waited 10 minutes and your iced mocha got skipped b/c of excessive barista bantering.
Posted by: melina | Aug 2, 2005 1:04:02 PM
Usually our customers aren't that bad - but lately, (I think due to the hot weather) it's gotten ridiculous. Some people are VERY inconsiderate and it drives me crazy! Like the people who have their children order (when there is a lineup out the door!!) for them AND THEN count out the exact change in dimes ($5!!!). Drives me crazy!
I will definitely go out of my way to make your time at Starbucks a good one, but when you start acting like you own me because you bought a coffee for $1.50, grow up. Stop being a #$@% and realize the world does NOT revolve around you and your freakin' cell phone!
Posted by: Meg | Aug 2, 2005 11:09:27 PM
Been with the 'bucks for 16 years. I guess I am just over being a prick as there are too many shitty partners in this company as is. I just work with folks, provide them with respect and patience. Only time I cut them no slack is if they lie or deceive me...once is all it takes. I dont get mad or treat them rudely, I just dont give them the benefits of a superb customer interaction.
Unfortunately, Starbucks hiring has been abominable as of late, too many ignorant partners under the age of 22 for my taste. Most are lame and suck big ass. :)
Posted by: Chirp | Aug 2, 2005 11:17:55 PM
I seriously give one starbucks in my town half of their business. I go there everyday, twice a day. And it's snots with high and mighty attitudes I hate to see in there. The stupid college kids with their 600 page textbooks, laptops, and bookbags. Okay, I understand a coffeehouse is supposed to be relaxing, but they need to save that shit for HOME. Not a public place with in and out customers who might want to sit down and enjoy their coffee. I hate children though, and see no point in bringing them to a mostly teen/adult oriented establishment. Especially when they're going to bitch and whine and deplete Starbuck's of their hot chocolate supply. I find it most enjoyable when there's two or three NORMAL people sitting down in the cafe, newspaper in hand, or talking to a friend, when ordering my drink. They always know exactly what I want every time I come in, and I don't even have to order most of the time. I think smoking sections should be prevalent in Starbucks. It's the one thing I disagree with most about that company. Everyone knows a fag is good with a big hot cup of coffee, and I wince every time I'd like a cigarette, and have to walk all the way out to the parking lot to stand there in the heat to have one.
Posted by: Lee | Aug 3, 2005 12:06:22 AM
As a customer, I hate when I have to listen to Baristas chatting with each other when I'm in a store trying to read. I mean loudly gossiping, flirting, whatever. Talk to each other all you want, just not so loudly!
As a Barista, I used to hate Mr. Bitter old man who would say, "I'll take a coffee." And you'd say, "What size would you like?", and he's say in a hostile and sarcastic-assed voice, "I'll take a coffee. Just coffee." Like he can't understand the nerve of me asking him what size he wants. That anything more than just "coffee" is too foo-foo, like even what size it is. So you're getting a short decaf, jerk.
Also, anyone who makes fun of Starbucks while they are in line, or gives you crap for working there. If you are too cool to be there, you're not getting a drink from me. In or out. Next.
Posted by: djadamg | Aug 3, 2005 8:47:20 PM
As a Barista I hate many things about my job, all which include the same miserable customers that come in every day. I especially hate when 100 people a day ask you if there is a key for you washroom. I hate when homeless people or crazy people use the washroom for at least 30 minutes. I hate it when you call a drink "decaf talll non fat latte" and the lady will say "Is this my decaf tall non fat latte?". Like yea bitch isnt that what I just said or are you fucking deaf. I hate when partenrs come into the store and get their markout, but not any old markout 1/4 pound of 4 types of coffee's. I hate when customers say they didnt order a drink that they really did order. Other than that, Starbucks treats me ok, I hate the majority of dumb ass customers, thats all!!
Posted by: yea ok | Aug 3, 2005 10:15:49 PM
I usually can tolerate most customers... but tonight, i needed a bad barista to back me up. We have one customer who comes in on occasion, and stands at the register for 20 min at a time, not ordering, because he wants whatever jennifer aniston or regis usually get. "what pasty do you think they would eat", " where do you think their apt is?". We live in a little town in IN, i have never met jennifer or regis, and i dont know what they drink.
Posted by: Ashlee | Aug 3, 2005 11:25:12 PM
I'm with you on the cappucino. I'm in a pretty slow ($1k a day) licensed store and I must get three people in each week who ask for a cappucino and then decide to add sugar and stir it at the condiment bar. Of course, they always come back and demand more. We are not so busy that you can't ask questions, please ask. I could have told you you wanted a latte. It's not that I mind remaking, particularly if you've been reasonably friendly, but it's when you are rude and demand something. I'll even offer if a guest is trying something for the first time to make something else if they don't like it but I won't do it for you if you are on your cellphone when you order, if you are rude to my employees, or expect free things when you are rude. Yesterday, I had a guest who couldn't decide what kind of frappucino she wanted. She was also on the phone and stood there for 5 minutes talking and hem and hawing about what to have. She orders then asks if she can have Vanilla bean powder for free or mocha for free or can we do it affogoto for free. I played bad barista and said I'd have to charge her for it.
Posted by: | Aug 4, 2005 10:55:00 AM
don't forget those people that know about the recovery coupons and intentionally return drinks knowing they will be handed one....i had mr king of the bar working and this woman returned her drink 3 times ..he kept r e making it, and apologizing for whatever error she decided it had...finally knowing I was the manager insisted she get a coupon or 2 because of it..a week later i was at the store down the road , and guess who was up to her old trick again...hmm big surprise.. no satisfaction at the bar...and requesting a coupon...cheap whinny bitch ..
ya bad barista thoughts were going through my mind...not one had to do with star sklls
Posted by: alexis | Aug 4, 2005 12:57:14 PM
If Starbucks Coffee wants to bring back conversation into the coffee houses try lowering the music. When we go into a Startbucks the music is so loud we can't talk, so we go outside or leave.
Posted by: | Aug 4, 2005 1:05:29 PM
Dear Chirp,
I absolutely agree with you on what you've said about the morons we've been hiring lately.
That being said, I'd like to poke any customer in the eye with a thermometer who does the following:
Customer: I'll have a coffee frappuccino
Barista: great, what size?
Customer: uh... (pulls out cell phone, waits for it to connect... asks friend what size they want) grande?
Just pick a size!
Posted by: disgruntledbarista | Aug 4, 2005 3:25:57 PM
I sometimes am the bad barista. Like when a customer throws there money on the counter (usually while they're on their cell phone), I REALLY like to throw there change back at them on the counter. So fun. I also like to "educate" customers about ordering sleaves on their drinks, and not asking me for sleaves at the hand off counter. Also fun. I also am the naughty barista. I work at starbucks during the day, and I work at a stripper club at night.
Posted by: antihero | Aug 4, 2005 3:39:53 PM
Ashlee: Regis comes into my Starbucks. I can find out from the morning people what he orders, but word is that he doesn't tip. His apt is across the street. His doormen usually get plain coffee, lattes or cappuccini.
Posted by: cornfrost | Aug 4, 2005 6:37:40 PM
I never give out a service recovery coupon because I believe that the majority of people do not deserve a service recovery coupon except maybe decaf shots in their triple grand vanilla soy no foam extra hot latte. Also when we completely make their drink they decide they want non-fat, they definetely get the decaf because I want them to feel my PAIN!!! HAHAHAHAHA! Yes I am iniquitous barista that won't even feel guilty after my vicious actions and instead will have a coy smile as you walk out your store. After all you are paying for you get a coffee, regular or decaf is priced in and doesn't cost anything more. Oh yeah, but I still like putting decaf Sumatra in the regular drip coffee in the morning right before open so those people who have to be there that early can get some nice decaf!
Posted by: Boston Starbucks Rebel | Aug 5, 2005 1:37:20 AM
As for the newspaper, my stance is that I will read the front page if I have to wait an unusually long time for my drink. What else am I gonna do? I don't unfold it, but I certainly wouldn't hesitate to buy a paper that someone had merely picked up and looked at the outside of. Big deal.
Posted by: mocha val | Aug 5, 2005 7:26:36 AM
I would love to see a bad barista kick the children out of the Starbucks stores. What is this new trend of parents bringing kids into Starbucks? It is very annoying for those of us trying to work on laptops or read the newspaper.
Posted by: Chicago | Aug 5, 2005 6:28:00 PM
It doesn't take a "Bad Barista" to ask someone to put there shirt back on or for a homeless person to not cause a bad time for everyone. If its something that can be approached appropriately then a good Partner will approach the issue. As for if maybe a customer is in line and maybe walking away from the counter that can be addressed by a partner in a polite and appropriate way such as "Excuse me but I will have to assist the next customer while you decide." If its something that is easily annoying you like a customer who makes a really difficult order when it can be simple well that's what we do! We deal with difficult customers all day and that's what it takes. Just say Yes. Its not your responsibility but ours and it is Our Pleasure to be of assistance to there needs. Maybe you should consider just ignoring the customer in front of you and maybe just thinking about what your plans for the day are instead. Our mission is to make All customers feel welcome and in there third place and if we can't for one because we are doing this for another we will do all we can to at least create a balance in that.
David (Mikey) Yama
Posted by: Mikey | Aug 6, 2005 12:29:26 AM
as a barista i hate when they
dig for spare change with a line behind them.
ask for any light frappacino.
the complicated drink order extra half shots but decaf.
correcting me when i say tall coffee, "no i wanted a small"
yelling across the counter in a threating tone, when you are putting whipped cream on someone elses drink.
Posted by: Jen | Aug 10, 2005 10:12:46 AM
Try being a Barista in Quebec, otherwise known as the nation unto its own sovereignity - where Mezzo is the "new" Tall and where we are under franchise, so no we cannot accept your *bucks gift card that still has five bucks on it just so you don't have to leave a tip. Christ. We have this dude who is a homeless guy who sings psalms. He shouts, set our bathroom soap dispenser on fire, and totally trys to steal from the tips all the time when he asks for water. Yes, we've kicked him out also, but you know, new baristas have no idea. Also - who steals Alannis CDs... like please. You actually want to hear Jagged Little Pill ----acoustic??!!! Oh the agony. And who's friggin' idea was it to bring Tracey Chapman and Joni Mitchell into the Playnetwork's playlist. Someone please sack the fool who did this!! If I hear Fast Car or Yellow Taxi one more time, I'm gonna go postal - like, for serious, yo. I'm saddened to say that Sly and the Family Stone is wearing on me too. And who's idea was it to change the prices - 4 cents as change for a small drip coffee from two dollars (a toonie) equals rolling tips for like 10 hours because of all the pennies. My back is sore just thinking about it.
Posted by: FUJIMO | Aug 10, 2005 5:19:44 PM
Just please stop people from bringing children into Starbucks. Coffee is for adults. I do not enjoy seeing small children run around while I am enjoying my coffee.
Posted by: | Aug 11, 2005 3:04:26 PM
how about the people who order Iced Capuccinos? or people who order Venti Soy Capuccinos? or the people who pay with $100 bills at 5:45 AM, and expect us to change it immediately.
Posted by: WhippedCreamWhippit | Aug 12, 2005 9:40:05 PM
Thank you all for the great reading. My fiance is a manager for Starbucks. She's going to get a real good laugh as I did. She'll be able to relate. I've heard the stories. People order a size...and they order it small, medium, or large...what is that? She says to herself..Bad Barista? Then she'll suggest a Grande, they'll say "yes, medium I think. Arrggh!! She thinks and with a smile. Break out the cup size as the line gets a little longer...suggestion for a bad barista anyone?? Lol...
Posted by: Kelli | Aug 13, 2005 1:07:10 PM
How many of you share Chirp's sentiment that students should stay at home to study? I didn't realize that I could be bothering someone...not that I'm going to stop going to Starbucks to study or anything, but if there's something we're doing that's particularly annoying, I'd like to know.
Posted by: student | Aug 13, 2005 1:10:47 PM
Ive also had a customer (through the drive thru) tell that IF she was inside that she would be mad at all of the people with their laptops, that studying should be done at home, and a coffee shop should be for relaxing, When i told her that i have been known to study here, and that sometimes you just need a quiet place to study, she remarked "your house isnt quiet enough for you". I just dont get it.
Posted by: NewShift | Aug 14, 2005 12:02:41 AM
I love that people feel comfortable enough at my starbucks to study and use the wireless connection.
Posted by: barista c | Aug 14, 2005 4:06:00 PM
I'm glad to see that someone else has noticed how annoyingly loud the music has become. This should be a thread of its own. Over the past month or so the music has often been uncharacteristically annoying. Absolutely impossible to have a conversation, read, or work on my laptop.
Posted by: Deeni | Aug 14, 2005 8:03:15 PM
1) if the music is too loud, ask your barista to turn it down . . . duh!
2) wtf is wrong with studying at a coffee house? i didn't know that me sitting at a table, by myself or with friends reading was disturbing you.
3) Get over yourself.
Posted by: Just Me | Aug 16, 2005 1:42:02 AM
The "bad barista" is called the Manager. Unfortunately, most of them are "I don't give a damn baristas", so nothing gets done. They are too self-involved. Then again, so are some of the people who frequent Starbucks (ie: young girls with Louis Vuitton purses, high schoolers driving fancy cars, old people who have stopped hanging out at McDonalds). Billionaires like Howard Shultz don't usually care. Try millionaires like Dutch Brothers, if one is in your town. They have sticker days, where they hand out stickers, and I heard that the employees make $900-$1500 just in tips....for those looking for a new place to work (No, I don't work for either of these places...although, the tip money would be good).
Posted by: Noah | Aug 17, 2005 2:16:09 PM
Ok, so I love working for starbucks, here's how you handle some of these situations (don't worry they are very satisfying)
1.The chick on the cell phone, just start talking to her, real loud, either she'll step away and you can carry on or she will order.
2. The old man that won't tell you what size? Helloooo, it's always venti
3. The indecisive... simply tell them you will be happy to help them when they are ready and take the next order.
4. The lady that takes the venti mocha frappuccino and takes a sip, telling you "this is not what I ordered", you look at the customer that it belongs to and say with a sickening sweet smile on your face "oh, I am so sorry, this lady accidentally took a sip of your drink, I will remake it for you right away" and make sure a few other customers hear you, then you give that dum-dum lady decaf and non-fat, oh, and go light on the caramel sauce...
5. free water, no problem, your water cup goes right in line with all the other drinks waiting to be made by the barista and you will wait like the rest of them, with a smile of course.
6. something free (oh, I wanted caramel sauce on that) "no problem, I will just go ahead and add that for you while Jennifer rings you up" "I'll meet you at the register"
7.As for the theft of tips/tip jars, we have taken the bottom completely off the tip jar (we had a "water" guy stealing the whole thing), so the next time he did it the coins went everywhere, he never came back... as for dipping in, you can say, "oh, you need to borrow a couple of quarters, you can just get us back next time" just make sure you say these things so other customers can hear, but with a smile. never fails the next customer or two will add to the pot.
8.And the long drink order, especially the SOY 180 no foam caramel macciato oh and can I get that stirred, you can wait, and wait, while your foam settles, and I call out a few "out of order grande mocha, out of order tall soy latte, etc." and then I'll pour your soy, and scoop the bubbles off the top, and then I will call another out of order something-er-other, and then I'll scoop some more bubbles, then finish your drink... you wanna mess with me? Oh, and you'll get a good one liner like " here's the best Venti soy 180 no foam stirred caramel macciato of the day" thanks for waiting, I hope you like it. Have a super day!"
You can practice saying f-u with a smile on your face, there is nothing more satisfying than watching the person you just told off, walk off completely satisfied and then seeing it "dawn" on them as they get out the door... zing!
Posted by: Ellieandcolin'smom | Aug 18, 2005 9:56:33 PM
OMG -- thank you so much, fellow baristas, for your comments!
And to our loyal and wonderful customers: thank you for making our job fun. It is because you smile and ask me how school is going or some other such humanizing comment that I can deal with the customers who treat me like I'm three steps below them on the evolutionary scale.
BTTS
Posted by: Barista to the Stars | Aug 19, 2005 7:48:32 AM
Thanks Just Me, I totally agree.
I've been out of school for years, but people complaining about students at Starbucks are truly sad. I'd like to hear you say that at midnight at the 24 hour Houston Starbucks, and see how long you survive. Twelve hours later the business deals and businessmen outnumber the kids, and you do NOT hear the kids ragging on them.
Students are part of the lifeblood of Starbucks, and if Starbucks didn't want people using laptops, they wouldn't have wireless connections and proudly show hotspot stickers on the front door. Having wifi connections was a huge advantage when I moved across six states this spring ...and it brings in lots of extra business to Starbucks from all sorts of people.
By the way, coffee became popular in Europe in the first place due to the SOCIAL nature of coffeehouses, because people wanted somewhere they could sit, read newspapers, write, and have political/other discussions. And oh yeah, STUDY, which some of these Europeans did decades before you even developed a taste for coffee.
Posted by: Live and let live, dorks | Aug 19, 2005 10:26:08 AM
I stumbled onto this page through a google search, and I was so completely shocked! First off, I didn't realize just how angry and intolerant the world was. As an ex-barista, as well as an ex-student, and a current mother, I would like to say that this is a public retail place we are talking about. If you only want certain types to go there, start an exclusive coffee shop for you and those you deem worthy. But otherwise realize that we fellow human beings also like to drink coffee and other such beverages sold at Starucks, and we are all together what makes Starbucks as successful as it is. If you don't want the average person in your coffee shop, don't go to one that is as popular as Starbucks is. So, students please enjoy your quiet time and studying, while being tolerant of the other customers who may occasionally disturb you. Customers, be curtious of the people who are working or studying and leave them alone. Everyone who uses cell phones, they are giving you brain cancer, so you'll get yours in the end. And as for those of you so disturbed by the children running amuk in the stores, I'm sorry for the spoiled ones that their parents don't discipline and are truly a nuisance. However as a mother of three children that LOVE Starbucks, I hope that you realize that you too were once a carefree child greatly enjoying the special treats that your parents occasionally splurged on for you, and can next time look at that child with different eyes remembering the joy that was once in your life before we all grew up into this bitter, hatred-filled, intolerant of others, downward spiral, road-raged, cell-phone glued, obese or anorexic, pharmaceutical-drugged, caffeine guzzling, self-centered...etc,etc,etc people that we are today.
Posted by: Gabrielle | Aug 19, 2005 11:53:15 AM
Im a working man who has little to say. Gabrielle is my wife and she loves starbucks and our kids. Have you people lost sight of what is really important? Why do we all think of only ourselves? Why are we so conserned with what everyone else is doing? People will be people and everyone just needs to understand that. You cant always have your way. Do unto others, and so forth. People just need to slow down life is to busy and to fast, and we are all missing it. If you dont care, then dont complain.
Posted by: Brian | Aug 19, 2005 9:38:46 PM
Brian & Gabrielle:
Wow. Everyone is entitled to their opinion -- this is the place to express it. How about a little tolerance for one that differs from yours? I don't think anyone is picking up the pitchforks yet -- and I don't necessarily agree with other posters regarding students. I am a student & I spread my happy little self out with my notecards & laptop all the time. I just wear headphones & ignore those that think I'm taking up more than my fair space.
But the kids -- well, that's another story. If you are taking your kids out for a "treat"; I think that's great. But please remember, all parents, if they make a mess, clean it up (that's what you'd do in your house). I'm not getting paid $7 an hour to clean up the 20,000 bits of pumpkin loaf that your kid left behind because you wanted to give them a "treat". It's not cute & nostalgic to let your kids make a huge mess and then skulk out or announce to the bar staff "there's a mess out here" and then herd your brood out to the car. I'm not your nanny.
Nor is it attractive to let your kid scream while you chitty chat. We have a joke at my Starbuck's -- "There's a velecoraptor in the cafe". Code for uncontrolled child that we can hear scream. It's not cute.
Well behaved children are always welcome. Parents who clean up after their children are always welcome.
I don't think that anyone here is bitter, but try cleaning up a Grande Strawberries & Cream Frappucino in the middle of an afternoon rush because Junior couldn't handle a straw and mommy thinks you're her maid and your opinion might change.
Not bitterness here, just frustration. And you are right, life is too busy & fast to spend it cleaning up after someone else's kids or listening to the high pitched wails of some kid who wants to be somewhere else. Trust me, that's not something I need to slow down and savor.
BTTS
Posted by: Barista to the Stars | Aug 20, 2005 12:44:33 AM
Amen, BTTS.
I have never heard anyone complain about students, and we are located right across from a college campus. Ever live in a dorm? You need a place to study, believe me, and you get tired of the library. Plus, they don't have mochas there.
As for children, I used to own a restaurant, and I did not allow kids to run wild in my dining room. I figure, people spent money on a sitter so they could enjoy a quiet, adult, kid-free meal, so who the hell are you to let your unruly spawn ruin it for them? And if your kid throws food, dumps his drink or screams, take care of it and shut up. It's your kid and your responsibility. Can you walk out without taking care of it? Sure. But believe this: we're calling you some vile names as you leave.
Posted by: javajockey | Aug 23, 2005 7:19:21 AM
If the baristas are irritated by the fact that customers can't pronouce the cutesy-poo made-up names for the *$ drinks, maybe the problem isn't with the customers. I'm sorry you're so hopped up that people cant find the word "Frappuccino" out there in the real world. And as I recall, Affogato involves ice cream and espresso, not ice and whipped cream.
Caribou gets along just fine with "Small," "Medium" and "Large." It's called "the English Language."
Posted by: Cafeholico | Aug 23, 2005 9:43:58 AM
I've been looking around for a forum for baristas and haven't found one, so I made one. We could use a place to vent, other than here.
Find it here:
www.baristablues.forumup.com
Posted by: bluebarista | Aug 23, 2005 1:30:42 PM
Yeah! Cafeholico's Right. We live in AMERICA - and we all speak AMERICAN! (Cafeholico's a dumbass and I'm sarcastic)
Posted by: | Aug 23, 2005 8:29:40 PM
Cafeholico:
You can't pronounce "tall"?
Oh, and by the way, what did Caribou's stock end at yesterday? Calling it "small" made all the difference, huh?
The number of bitter, jealous Sbux wannabes just amazes me.
Posted by: javajockey | Aug 24, 2005 7:37:08 AM
Hey, I like *$'s just fine. I also know that Caribou is just another corporate franchise (with its current ownership incorporated in Bahrain, no less) and I was annoyed at how "patriotic" my local Caribou became right at the same time as the "Starbucks doesn't support our troops" rumors.
I'm just saying, when you manufacture names for your product or borrow from other languages, be it "Venti," "Frappucchino," "Chimera," or even "Hyundai," then it's no good venting your spleen at customers who can't pronounce it ("It's FOLKS-VAG-IN, not VOLKS-WAG-IN, you twit!").
Jealous? Jealous of what?
Posted by: Cafeholico | Aug 24, 2005 10:03:01 AM
And if I had my way, I'd have a "hang up cell phones before ordering" sign up, too!
Posted by: Cafeholico | Aug 24, 2005 10:05:00 AM
What I also hate is how some people refer to Coffee Frappuccino as Ice Capp. What the hell? Can you at least look at what coffee shop you're entering b4 you F-----g order? Also, I love how some customers think that they're in an ice cream shop! What morons. I didn't realize that Sbux and Dairy Queen looked alike.
I can't stand the customers who very slowly tell you their order as if you are the retard one even though you've been seeing them everyday for the last week, and they kept getting the same thing.
I also can't stand those cheat @$$holes who think that by giving you the 2 cent change is some kind of favour. Also, the customers who WAIT for their 1 or 2 cent change! What the hell???!
Posted by: Jolie | Aug 27, 2005 1:20:00 PM
I don't mind filling up a water or two, but the highschool and college kids in our town have gone too far. You're at a coffee shop, get some damn coffee for once. I have no intention of filling up 6 waters for you and your cheap loud friends. And by the way, if you're looking for a quick way to piss off the person behind the machines making your drinks--be sure to ask THEM for a water, as if they have nothing better to do than cater to your lazy ass and as though there isnt already a line of people to the door and 20 drinks ahead of your h2o. If you want a water, wait in line, and ask for it sweet as sugar because otherwise just about anyone will get bitter about it eventually. (bad barista: "Sure, there's a sink in the bathroom, you can fill up that cup when you're done with your latte")
As for homeless people hanging out in Starbucks, I don't mind them being around as long as they have manners and don't expect handouts from us. Everyone else is paying for their coffee, and just because you don't have a job doesn't make you special enough for me to give you some for free. If you can walk to Starbucks everyday, you can walk a little farther and make it to the Salvation Army. They'll feed you and give you free coffee, and help you find a job so you won't have to beg for free coffee from me anymore.
(bad barista: "Don't ask me to ask my manager if you can have free coffee- I already know the answer...and after hearing it this many days in a row, I would have thought you might too.")
Posted by: J | Aug 29, 2005 1:32:01 AM
1) The no shirt thing....it is completely and totally against Chicago health code to be in an eating establishment without shirt or shoes.
2) Homeless people...most in my area of the city are more than a little bit nuts..and I know one store in the area that had to get rid of their fancy squishy chairs because a homeless person fell asleep and peed on it. I don't mind handing out the free water, but hang around and I will ask your homeless self to leave.
3) After having our stolen by transvestite prostitutes one too many times, we velcroed ours to the counter..so it makes that fun ripping sound if someone tries to steal it.
4) Customers who 'borrow' from the tip jar. Thank god this isn't a probelm at my present store!!! But when I was at a store where it was...I just smiled really big and said, 'Um, that's our tip jar, not give a penny take a penny.' And stood there waiting . If they didn't get it, I would politely inform them that that was not their money and I didn't have to accept it. I actually had a manager tell me this was okay, though that was years and years ago. I have no idea if this would really be acceptable or not. I think the best approach is to just hide the tip jar when a known offender comes in. It's easier than the confrontation.
Posted by: Bettiebarista | Aug 29, 2005 5:38:10 PM
Good Customer!
I was in a DC store when a bus load of hurricane evacuees came walking in from across the street. (The bus was parked at a gas station.) One customer in the store recognized who these people were and immediately approached the manager. The man volunteered to pay for anything the people wanted with his credit card. The store manager thanked him politely, and said it wasn't necessary. She instructed her employees to mark out all the drinks and pastries ordered by the evacuees.
Posted by: bluebarista | Sep 9, 2005 10:40:22 PM
I could go on forever, but I'll choose just one good rant...
I absolutely want to strangle anyone who orders one or more frappuccinos from the hours of 6:00a.m. to 11:00a.m. jesus christ, must you insist on toruring me by forcing me to make your goddamn two venti caramel fraps with two add shots in each with whipped cream and mocha sauce?? who in their right mind drinks that before the sun even comes up?
-LK from PA
Posted by: Lindsay | Sep 18, 2005 9:33:03 AM
I would like to personally apologize to every barista that I may have pissed off for the following:
1. Even glancing at the menu board when I get to the counter. (Someday I will order something new...)
2. Digging out change in my purse. (Crap, I KNEW I had a ten in here, where is the damn thing...)
3. Asking if you have something that is not in the glass case. (I came here specifically because I REALLY wanted a frosted cookie, and I know it's silly, but it will just make my day if you have some in the back...)
Just thought you may want to hear it from a customer.
Posted by: starappolo | Sep 18, 2005 8:26:07 PM
the goddamn overpriveledged bitches with their seventeen different zippie clutch-style wallets that contain zero cash and twelve different credit cards, of which only one isn't maxed, who needs to talk on the phone with one ear and listen to her ipod nano on the other while shushing me so her friend on the other end doesn't know she's taking time out of their important conversation about guiding light to purchase a 7 dollar overly complicated to prove the point she can make a decision macchiato--oh wait did i ask for that iced? and all i have to say is--maybe if you weren't on the fucking telephone you would have!!!
Posted by: billie | Sep 28, 2005 8:37:26 PM
Billie...I hope you responded with a smile of course...lol
Cheers
Posted by: Kelli | Oct 2, 2005 2:50:47 PM
In defense of "old codgers", if they're holding their own vis a vis profit per table, hell, I'd want more of them.
Someone way back mentioned having a chance to make a "perfect cappuccino". Then in the same sentence mentioned a 'grande'. Which makes the first part meaningless. Anything larger than a 12oz cappa can't be perfect, doesn't matter how great your foam is. And it's gotta be ceramic.
As for the 180 v. 185 degree people... just hit them with a bat. Really. They're likely the same people who send back bottles of perfectly good wine but, when exposed to an actual bad bottle, wouldn't have a clue.
Perhaps a small card explaining the following is apporpriate to hand out to such customers:
"Every coffee bean, Starbucks or otherwise, is a work of nature meant to be ground a certain way, tamped to a specific pressure and matched to specific brewing equipment, water pressure and temperature so as to extract the perfect flavor, body and crema each and every time. So don't fuck with it, you pretentious asswipe."
Admittedly, I personally don't know what temp that is with Starbucks beans. And I don't care. Just give me the beans at the temp your gear is designed for. I'll even smack the 180/185 degree people for you.
Posted by: RichW | Oct 19, 2005 9:16:05 PM
In our store, we have a big problem with people standing in counter entryway. Mostly, they stand basically all the way behind the counter, causally leaning over watching the employees work. This on its own is an extreme annoyance, but, with them being so close to their drink being made, it encourages them to be overly critical about everything you do, even if the drink you are making is not theirs. It's especially frustrating when they decide it's necessary to forcibly push your hand away from a drink because ‘that's too much foam!’, ‘I asked for no whipped cream!’, or ‘I don’t like that much caramel!’. Other times they do the opposite by taking your caramel or mocha bottle, declaring that you shorted them their drizzle and they deserve more, and give themselves a good inch thick layer of syrup at the bottom of their cup.
Posted by: Tanna | Nov 19, 2005 9:02:01 PM
tanna-
isn't that customer behavior illegal? or at least violation of health codes? i think i would remind them of the fact that as non employees of starbucks they cant touch the equipment... or something along those lines...
Posted by: cat | Nov 22, 2005 12:19:22 AM
Stumbled in here after a Google search, and will be sure to bookmark. After a 13 hour day of making blended drinks for snotty teen girls at the mall, (oh how I long for a neighbourhood store...or a Bad Barista) this is more refreshing than anything on the menu board. I'll be sharing with my co-workers for sure. Cheers!
Posted by: LadyRavenHeart | Nov 22, 2005 11:18:08 PM
Starbucks is a great place. I particularly like the iced lemon poundcake. The coffee is just a little too bitter for me unless I order a drink with lots of milk. The people serving me are always polite. THere are a few of them that expect just a little too much. I often meet them on the street, and the first thing that pops out of their mouths is "Oh I see you every day, I'm the one that gives you your coffee in the morning" I repond "I buy my coffee like everyone else, and I'd still like to see your license, registration and insurance card....please"
Posted by: One of The Boys | Feb 23, 2006 10:53:58 AM
Just stumbled across this site a few days ago. I just did a tour of duty with a competing coffee shop during Christmas break (I normally work for a college library). I signed on with Joe Muggs (Books-A-Million) here in my town (Brunswick, GA). That was the absolutely wrong time to start with any coffee shop, but as there is only Joe Muggs here in Brunswick (not counting mom and pop joints, which are well out of the way of the shopping centers...)we were constantly slammed. It amazes me that people who ordinarily wouldn't dirty their hard-earned money with fancy-ass coffee suddenly came in for peppermint mochas and wondered about the green tea frappes. Not to mention every suburban housewife who simply HAD to show her out-of-town relatives a good time and buy 10-13 people a ton of incredibly complicated f*cking drinks. Everything else I read here is a little too familiar. I quit after a week and went back to the sanctity of the library! I'm such a wimp...
Posted by: AtlanticVamp | Apr 10, 2006 1:53:18 PM
One Bad Barista at every store, are you kidding me? There are at least four at every store. Their not bouncers though, just bad baristas. Just kidding. But seriously, the zen of working at these places is trying not to get caught up in other peoples bulls*it. Why there are a million things I can't stand about customer's attitudes, I don't really care how other people act. It is not my job to correct people and if they want to take out their small and insignificant life out on me, I could care less. The fact that I would take a total strangers attitude personally is ridiculous. If you take everyones attitude personally, life is very difficult. Just be yourself and let the chips fall where they may.
Posted by: BaristaBoy | Apr 10, 2006 4:02:59 PM
wow I'm just glad I'm at a good store. Right across from the university. :)
All our customers are profs and students.
And yes if you come into our store and are obviously homeless and dirty I will ask you nicely as possible to leave. And I will force the issue if you try and make a scene. I may not have to touch your dirty rear but the cops seem to enjoy removing your butt. :P
Espeically when I give them a free drip coffee afterwards for helping keep our cafe a more welcoming place.
that's really all that any Barista needs to know. Just be NICE AND WELCOMING and people won't try to treat you like crap. Those homeless people will go bye bye the moment he has to deal with the cops too. Trust me customers appreciate seeing that homeless guy getting kicked out. (Any customers want to back me on that one?)
That's really what the third place is all about for a lot of us. Take it easy. Customers are not where near as mean as you make them out to be if you just show them a bit of respect and keep their cafe clean and bum free (how can you tell I hate homeless people :P)
Posted by: Thatcoffeeguy. :) | Apr 10, 2006 10:35:14 PM
I don't have a probelm with homless people, alot got a raw deal when stat institutions got defederalised by Regan. What I can't stand are homless people who hound customers, make children cry, drink from the pitchers (infront of customers) and enjoy making people uncomfortable. I like talking to all people but dont interject "I find you speacial and would like to have intercourse with you; what's your name?" especially while you smell and are grossly unkept (homeless people too!). Other than that I love the coffee culture, but I don't understand why my starbucks sells New York Times (we are located in Florida), but not USA Today!
Posted by: Kat | Apr 23, 2006 3:38:57 PM
You shouldn't be working at starbucks unless making the customer happy is your number 1 priority. Thats what you are getting paid to do. If you don't like that you have to put up with girls on cell phones or annoying little kids, then quit.
Posted by: | Apr 23, 2006 7:07:12 PM
"You shouldn't be working at starbucks unless making the customer happy is your number 1 priority. Thats what you are getting paid to do. If you don't like that you have to put up with girls on cell phones or annoying little kids, then quit."
I say, if you haven't walked a mile in a Starbucks barista's shoes, then maybe you should try it. Try dealing with some moron who can't be bothered to get off their cell phone long enough to order coffee, or some parent who thinks ALL of us want to be subjected to their screaming brood of demon spawn.
I'd be curious if this anonymous poster has ever had to try to do your job efficiently and politely dealing with these types of customers. I hit my Seattle Starbucks every day I'm in the office and I've seen every single example of all the annoyances listed here. I've also been known to overtip the barista if a jerk has been in line in front of me-I feel sorry for those behind the counter!
Posted by: pnwgal | Apr 24, 2006 2:56:16 PM
Hey - whats with Starbucks not wanting to give McDonalds a contract to serve their coffee? I mean, whats the deal with that anyway?
Posted by: Rishad | Apr 28, 2006 12:21:05 AM
Now that I think about it, Starbucks have refused to give McDonalds a contract to serve their coffee, probably because it might tarnish their brand image - can't think of any other reason though......
Posted by: Rishad | Apr 28, 2006 12:23:43 AM
I make sure I still tip even if I use a giftcard. Im a waitress so I know how much better your job is with those tips.
Posted by: Liz | Apr 29, 2006 4:45:22 PM
So day two on the floor, and I experienced my first truly insane customer. This lady litterally screamed at me, because the caramel machaiatto I gave her had coffee in it! (?) Apparantly, she has been to starbucks every day for the past 6 years, and every day she orders a caramel machiatto, and it has never once had coffee in it, so who the hell do I think I am, putting this shit-assed coffee in her drink? WTF?? Can I be the bad-assed barista even though I'm new? She went at it for about 5 minutes, until the manager asked her to leave (thank god)
Posted by: Newbiebarista | Apr 30, 2006 8:32:13 PM
The moms who set their diapered kid on the counter or the condiment bar..
Posted by: catty | May 1, 2006 3:18:26 PM
The ones who is so bothered about someone that would go in Starbucks with their lap tops or study books and sit down at the table to be relax to do what ever they need to do is such a PETTY offence to pick on. Big whoopie do if they are there for two hours. I seen people go in there and take up a table and talk the same amount of time. Starbucks is made as a relaxing atmosphere with Tables and sofa's. They even provide wireless internet. The coffee house plays mellow music, light color decor. If Starbucks was really in business to rush people out the door and not have them sit there long hours at a time doing their home work, looking up stuff on the laptop for personal or business use, Starbucks would have ridiculous decor like Mac Donalds and annoying music playing. Stop and think about why there is a difference in the decor of the place much less would not provide wireless Internet connection in the shop if they really did not expect their patrons to stick around.
Pathetic thing to gripe about.
Posted by: Terri | Jun 18, 2006 7:14:05 AM
"7) The bad barista who tells the homeless people to get out and get a job. And when they get out that means not standing next to the door and begging for money."
You realize you can poliety ask those people to leave and tell them they are disrupting business. If they still refuse to leave or just wait outside the door and beg for money just call the cops. Homeless people are not allowed to disrupt the thrid place.
Posted by: | Jun 18, 2006 7:32:43 AM
"Just please stop people from bringing children into Starbucks. Coffee is for adults. I do not enjoy seeing small children run around while I am enjoying my coffee."
someone posted this previously and i can't agree more. i do not want children screaming and playing while i enjoy my coffee in a relaxed coffee house setting. either dont bring them or keep them quiet!
Posted by: customer | Mar 3, 2007 7:25:12 PM
I just got on here to apologize for my fellow teenagers. I can't help it if 99% of them all total morons, but I feel bad about it anyway. I've never had problems with a barista, ever, (rude or screwing up my drink) but then, I never customize my drink in anyway. I'm a plain vanilla person.
I wince when I see some gaggle of overly suntanned college girls swish into the building to start talking to EACH OTHER and clogging up the friggin store and ordering their stupid nonfat drinks because their pimp boyfriend thinks they should only weigh 95 lbs, and their biggest goal is to stay at 95 lbs, gag, they disgust me. If I were bad barista, I'd shoot their cell-phones out of their hands, or make all their non-fat, extra light crapola the most sugary, fatty, whole milk plus high fructose corn syrup way that I could. They'd probably drop over dead because their starved little bodies can't handle calories anymore.
Posted by: Babs | Jun 15, 2007 3:13:50 PM
who in their right mind drinks that before the sun even comes up?
Lindsay -- I get up at 5:30 and have breakfast immediately. I work in Colorado, but on East coast time because I'm a telecommuter. By 10:00, it's been 4+ hours since my breakfast. Do the math: for people who eat breakfast at 8; noon is lunchtime. 10:00 for me is "lunchtime", and in the middle of the summer, a grande mocha light frappucino hits the spot ... yes; even before 11.
I'm thinking there are probably also swing shift or night shift workers for whom 6:00 AM = dinner time, so that's who drinks those drinks before the sun comes up.
Posted by: Antof9 | Aug 29, 2007 7:56:20 PM
Sexism is, is not a problem in society
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Buyers of guns must take gun-safety courses
Posted by: adjunct | Sep 30, 2007 7:35:03 AM
